i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
