so explain again why im purple
no
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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