Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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