He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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