Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
The feeling are messing with the penis
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
