I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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