the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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