That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
