Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
