Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
