Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
