So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Randomize
