you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Randomize
