I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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