So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Randomize
