He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Randomize
