The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
