Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
