would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
