On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize