i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
