I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
