Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
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