can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
