was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Everyone says I win the strip club
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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