i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize