I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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