shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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