is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
