I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
Barsexuality is the new black.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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