so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
