there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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