You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
