On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
