i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
