your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
