I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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