love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize