another moral hangover. fuck.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize