It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Randomize
