I must be too annoying 4 u.
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
