Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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