I'm jealous of your bromance
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I believe in your delicious
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize