I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
