if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
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