i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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