Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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