yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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