My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
