just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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