3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
