Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I don't deserve a penis
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize